I have been super lazy the last couple of weeks. seems it all started about the time I got the laptop. thinking that might not have been so smart! I was on a super roll creating layouts, cranking out several a week, then poof, it all stopped. all because I can now sit in the recliner while playing candy crush on facebook! it's dreadful, and I say to myself, get up get up, go do something, and then myself says, oh but you have a life left! Not tonight! Tonight I am going to work in my flower beds, I think, depends on how much willpower I have come 6pm.
Here's a layout about Tommy the Toad, who lives in my backyard each spring, summer, and fall. He was there when we first moved in, loving the pool I guess. I even had to kill a few snakes to keep him safe. I really didn't expect to see him the following year, but as we opened the pool, we found him under the tarp, his home for winter. He's been in our yard ever since, and yes, it's the same one! I even made him a house 2 years ago, and last year, Tammy came to live with him and they had babies. I'm really a bit surprised at my fascination with this toad! I'm sure the entire neighborhood is as well, because they can all hear my screams of excitement when I yell to David, "Tommy's Back, Tommy's Back!!"
The lighting on my pictures isn't the greatest, because I didn't worry about it, thinking I'd adjust it with photoshop, except I'm too busy playing Candy Crush to figure out photoshop!! See a pattern here!
it's a beautiful day in Oklahoma today. sun is shining and I need to get outside and do some yard work but can't seem to. my laptop arrived this week, and while I was excited to get it, getting everything loaded onto it is really time consuming. :) I've downloaded a trial version of photoshop elements, so I've been playing. and playing. and playing some more. it's safe to say that I'm hooked!
I haven't even been in my scraproom to play for a few days, but am planning on getting in there during the Ranger game. do a little scrapping and watch some baseball.
I've actually set myself up a fantasy baseball team this season, and it's been fun. David and Matt have one in the same league too, and Matt has been leading in scores since day one. it's funny, he'll call and we'll talk baseball. just one more memory we are making. I think it's cool that he calls me to talk baseball.
it's a bit strange, but I've not much to say. very unusual for my chatterbox self.
I needed to get my 4 Gossamer Blue layouts posted by today. so far I've done the 4 each month to get my free album. one more month to go! woohoo!!
let's see if I can't get this wrapped up now. you guys see what I mean though, about it being an awfully long story/nightmare/WTH moment!
after we left the second meeting with the lawyer, we did feel better. the lawyer said he wanted to let a couple months go by, get through the holidays and things calm down before he went to talk to the DA. that he felt that these women were a loose cannon and a big joke. it was obvious they were lying, and would be no problem to get the charges dropped.
it's April now, and the lawyer is wanting Matt to come in. I didn't go, but David did, and we still do not know what happened. this lawyer, while he was always pretty arrogant and full of himself, seemed to be even more so now. he told Matt that he wanted his transcript from high school and college and that Matt might want to enroll in anger management, that it would look good for him. when he was asked why, he'd just change the subject to how he knew what he was doing, he knew how to defend people, yada yada yada. now it's June and each month the lawyer is getting the case postponed, which wasn't a big deal, but now he is angry that Matt has not completed anger management. he tells Matt that we can not proceed until he had completed 6 weeks of it and that Matt needs to write a letter to the judge about what he has learned and how sorry he is??????
to keep from repeating myself over and over by saying we don't what happened, we simply do not know. why this lawyer did an about face, who knows. he never could/would give us an answer. when David and I tried to talk to him, he pretty much ignored us, except for when he told me I needed to let Matt grow up and be a man. that he was a good kid, I'd done my job and he didn't need me trying to run things.
I know you are probably thinking, why didn't you just get another lawyer? because we thought that too! we wrestled with it and agonized over it, but we had already paid this man a lot of money. if we got another lawyer, we'd have to pay them the same money we'd already paid, if not more!
then the lawyer started getting shady. by now David had stopped going with Matt, each time there was some reason the case was postponed, and once we stopped going the lawyer started telling Matt he needed to bring more money. now remember, we'd already paid this man, agreed upon his price, and signed documents. one time he told Matt he needed to bring $1000.00 more. the next time it was $750.00.
then $1500.00. we'd call the office to see what we owed for but the secretary would tell us nothing, we were paid in full. and of course, the lawyer wanted cash. with the exception of our first payment being in cash, the remainder had been paid by check, so, why must it be cash. Matt would ask him what the money was for and he'd say we have to pay the DA. there are court costs, just fees involved that need to be taken care of so I'll need you to bring me this money.
in Jan there was another court date, but it was postponed as well. the lawyer tells Matt "if you want this to be over next month, you need to bring the cash with you to my office" so now we have a date for Feb 28th, and we all know this guy is trying to take advantage of Matt. the lawyer has also told Matt at this point that he will plead guilty. David and I go to the Feb appt. and when it wasn't confusing, it was ugly!
the guy started out rambling and then starts telling us something about he is going to ask us questions about what kind of kid Matt was growing up, to give a background story. I found that really odd, since first of all he is saying Matt is going to plead guilty and secondly he had no clue we were coming, so why are we going to be on the stand to testify? he'd never asked us to or mentioned it before. then, he says to Matt did you bring all the money? the $1500.00? Matt said no I did not, I only brought $250.00. our plan was that whatever needed to be paid at the courthouse would be paid, we were not giving this guy anymore money. but that isn't what he wanted.
from the day the lawyer started telling Matt he needed to bring money, he never could tell him what it was for. and the man was shady! I'm sure this has worked for him before, and he was plenty mad it wasn't working for him on this day!
so the lawyer starts yelling saying WHY? Matt says what is the money for. the lawyer says WHY? that is all he will say, WHY WHY WHY, like a 2 yr old! he never does tell us what the money is for. David tries to ask what the money is for, he tells David "I am speaking to my client". ummm, dude, who paid you? then.... he seriously throws us out of his office! Tells us all to get the hell out of his office. I must say that I was extremely proud of Matthew. he held his own and did not let this man push him around. he stayed calm, was not out of control. he did not yell, but he did tell the lawyer that he didn't need to be screaming at him. he acted like a responsible mature man.
we all agreed to not give the lawyer this money he was now asking for, and I knew we were taking a chance, but I sure was shocked when he reacted the way he did. all I could think was buddy, you need that high dollar anger management class. as we got outside, I wasn't crying or screeching, but I was shaking and could not stop. I said he is going to throw Matt under the bus, you just know he is. For the next 45 minutes I could not stop shaking. I felt bad for Matt, I felt bad for Kristin, and now I was getting mad! David tells Matt, do not agree to anything or sign anything until we know for sure what is going on. then the lawyer comes in, calls us into a room and starts out with this you never want to tick of your lawyer. he's on your side, and I'm thinking to myself, then act like it! it was almost comical, because at this point he had kinda changed his tune a little and was telling us that we'd need a lawyer to get this off Matt's record and he'd be happy to do it. I think at that moment I snorted a little, and he said well you probably wouldn't want to hire me and to be honest, I don't know that I'd take you. whatever dude! he knew at that moment though, he went on to say how we were probably going to go trash his name and never use him again, so he knew he had messed up. he tells Matt, I don't care if you have the money or not, it wasn't for me, it was for your court costs, but you can pay them out. so why the big fit? and after it was all over, we didn't ask him, we just simply didn't say anything, because I said we are taking the high road on this one. it doesn't matter, we'll never see him again, we'll never use him again. he knows he tried to take advantage of Matt and he knows we know, nothing else really matters.
the lawyer says this is what we've agreed to, 6 months deferred adjudication. no probation officer to report to or probation fees to pay, just stay out of trouble and at the end of 6 months we will have it expunged from your record, it will be like it never happened. that is what you will need a lawyer for, it will cost about $250.00, but you probably will not call me. REALLY DUDE?
oh and the charge, unlawful carry of a weapon, a misdemeanor
David and Matt went into the judges room, it took him 2 minutes to sign it, he told Matt he seemed like a responsible young man and this was a little messed up. then down to the DA's office, and he said the same thing, which if that's what you guys think, we are we here? at any rate, all court costs were paid, it was about $500.00, which is a far cry from the $1500.00 the lawyer was trying to say it'd be.
I guess everyone needed to have their cut of the money. I don't know, none of it makes sense to me. but it's almost over.
Matt just has to not get in trouble, which normally wouldn't be a problem, but as David said after we left the courthouse,
staying out of trouble and NOT getting into trouble are two different things!
he is about to have a baby to help take care of, any day now, so I'm thinking with college, work, and a baby, he'll be too busy to go anywhere!
I know this is just crazy, and it shouldn't have happened, but it could have been much worse. those women could have had a gun and shot him. there are so many ways it could have been worse, and while it's been like a crazy lifetime movie nightmare, it's close to being just a distant memory.
the lesson learned here..... don't try to fight crazy! seriously though, the lesson, sometimes it is better to just walk away.
now that you've read it all, how many of you that know me can believe I managed to stay quiet during all this lawyer stuff and not get all redneck! I'm still not believing it!
here's a couple more layouts, Matt moving us into the new house and Jessica's Valentine Dance her Sr. year.
David and I are now on our way to Lawton, and that 30 minute drive took forever. remember at this point all we know is Matt has been arrested for assault with a deadly weapon and nothing makes any sense. all I can think is I need to see him, there has to be something we do not know. we get to the courthouse, find the sheriff's dept/jail and in we go. I tell them I'd like to see my son, and they promptly tell me I can not. you'd have thought they said he's been transferred to Rikers Island already from the way those words, you can not, hit me. it would seem that he had yet to be processed in, and until he went before the judge, we could not see him. the judge only does this at 10am and 2pm, and we'd missed the 10am. plus, there was no guarantee he'd be in the 2pm one, depends on when the arresting deputy would have his paper work filled out, and since they didn't normally do their paperwork until the end of their shift, well, you get the picture. all of this is being told to us by the Sheriff himself, who seems a little more interested in telling us how Matt is over at the jail and that he is no longer in charge of that because someone thought he wasn't capable of handling it, and maybe they'd have more information. evidently this still hadn't really sunk in with me because I looked at them as if they had 3 heads and said you don't understand, he has finals today!! then this sheriff, who I would not vote for, looked at me as if I were delusional and said you understand he pointed a gun at two women and then threatened them with a bat! I must have gotten defensive or aggressive at that point, I don't really remember, but I said what?? a bat?? did anyone find a bat?? because I'd forgotten about the softball equipment in the trunk of the car, it'd only been there 4 years. I'm asking what kind of gun he had, and this sheriff takes a step towards me, because I must be out of control and look ever so dangerous, and honestly I can't even remember what he said, just that suddenly he wasn't very nice and I had the quick thought that me making these people mad was not going to help. anyway, the people in there are directing us to other side of the courthouse and as we are going to leave one of the women there looks at me and says "tuff love mom, sometimes you just have to leave them here so they can understand what they've done wrong". to this day I still wonder if David hadn't wisely put his hand on back and helped me move towards the door if I wouldn't have ended up in a cell next to Matthew.
we go to where Matt is being held and of course they tell us we can't see him, that maybe he'll be on the 2pm docket and we can see him after. we are now starting to realize we need help and call a good friend of David's who is an attorney in a neighboring town. he tells us that we need to find a lawyer there, one of the good 'ole boys who plays with the DA, because if we can get someone in there to talk to the DA before Matt is charged and keep him from being charged with a felony it will help. it's politics and if you don't play, then you pay the price.
we were given a couple names of local attorneys but no one was in their office, so we left messages. we hung around until 2 to find out if Matt made it on the docket, after discovering he didn't and that he would have to stay overnight and that I could not see him, again, you can imagine how hearing those words hit me. we still didn't know what happened, why he did this, if he's admitted to anything. and, we still have no lawyer. we come back home, because there is nothing else we can do, but wait. I went back to the office, talked with my boss and he said go home, I'll make some calls. about 15 minutes later I get a text from him telling me a lawyer would be calling. and he did, David talked to him and the lawyer said he would take the case or he could contact someone in Lawton for us. we decided to go with the attorney from Lawton because he was there and because he charged less. if we only known then what we know now, we'd have spent the extra money. anyway, by now it's after 4pm, this lawyer says I'll take the case, but before I go to the jail and talk with Matt you need to pay me a retainer and in cash. now we are in a mad rush to get to the bank to take out CASH and get it to this man before 5pm so he can go and talk to Matt to make sure he hasn't confessed to anything. by the time we got there the lawyer had already spoke to Matt, he said Matt hadn't admitted to anything and that Matt is saying these women were following him and he had called 911 for help. so now we are really confused, because this is the first we heard of him calling 911. it would take to long to go over all the attorney said, I can tell you he was more interested in telling us who all he had defended and about how much he was going to charge. His price was given and he stated that this is what it was going to cost us for him to represent Matt and that included a trial with only the judge presiding, but if it were a jury trial then he would need to charge us extra. All that was agreed up, a document signed, and his words were "this is an open and close case and I love taking cases I know I can win!" now remember, he gave us his price, that will be important later.
as we are driving back home, I guess it all hit me, I looked at David and said we just paid a man who defends child molesters money to try and keep Matt out of jail, what is happening? the lawyer did tell us he'd call and let us know if Matt was going to get on the 10am docket, he knew Matt had finals and would try to get him on it. he also told us not to be there tomorrow when Matt went to court, that he'd call us after. I must have looked a little shocked at that because he told me that it wasn't something I'd want to see. that Matt would be brought in to court in the orange jail suit and handcuffed. I remember thinking that I must be dreaming, this could not possibly be real. how could this morning Matt been talking about being ready for his finals, how last night we were sitting together laughing about the mother son teams on fear factor, and now he is spending the night in jail.
by now we are back home, I've not talked to Matt, he doesn't know that they will not let us see him, he doesn't know we are doing everything possible to get him out. yes, he has seen the lawyer, but he hasn't seen me. I can't eat, there's no sleeping, and morning is here. I've been praying for the last 20 hours, non-stop. I'm sure God was wanting Matt to be on the 10am docket so I'd let Him have a break! we are not planning to go to court, because the lawyer told us we didn't want to see him that way. 9am and no word from the lawyer, finally a little after 10am they call, Matt will be on the 2pm docket. by now it has been over 24hrs and he has missed 2 days of college finals. they tell us we can pick him up sometime after 3pm and suddenly I think no, no I am not going to wait here, no, I am not going to let him go to court and not see us there, just simply NO. the thought of him feeling all alone is much worse than anything I could possible feel by seeing him with handcuffs on. it was the right decision to make, but nothing can prepare you for that sight. We were sitting on a bench, outside the elevators, Kristin and her mother were there too. The elevators open and one by one the men who are on the docket start coming off, in orange jumpsuits, their hands and feet are cuffed, they are chained to each other. they shuffle out, chains clanking. like hardened criminals on a chain gang. Matthew was number 6 of 9, and as he came off the elevator and saw me, he immediately looked at the floor. you could tell he was ashamed, and all I wanted to do was hug him and tell him I loved him, but couldn't. still to this day I do not know how I managed to not pass out, all dramatic like you see in the movies... the hand goes up to your forehead and you just swoon! wouldn't that have been something. but, I didn't pass out, I didn't fall apart, and I kept looking at Matt, waiting for him to look up and make eye contact so I could mouth to him, it's going to be ok.
everyone in there had to go through the reading of their charges and pleading and so on. Matt plead not guilty, we were not sure what he was pleading not guilty to, just that he plead not guilty. that part is over, now we just wait for him to be released, and thankfully, we did not have to post bail. so, downstairs, outside and around the building we go to wait, and wait, and wait. thankfully, it was a nice warm December day. finally Matt comes out, and we get to talk to him, and this is where it gets interesting.
when the police showed up at the clinic, Matt thought they were there because he'd called for help. so when this deputy got there and said we'll just let the judge sort it out, Matt thought they were taking him to tell the judge what happened. by this time K's mom has arrived and she is talking with the police officers saying this is insane, to which they agree. the deputy tells Matt to put his hands behind his back as he pulls out his handcuffs and Matt is in shock! he says why, and the deputy is all you are resisting arrest! he has not been read his rights, just handcuffed and put in the car. and now he is in a panic because he has finals in an hour. it's several hours later when he is told he probably isn't getting out tonight that he says what is going on?? he still hasn't been read his rights, they hadn't told him why he was there, and he honestly though he was waiting to tell the judge what had happened. that is when they tell him he is being charged with assault with a deadly weapon. you think his world didn't come crashing down at that moment. it's not until 9pm that he gets his phone call, only problem is, like many, his numbers are all programed into his cell phone and he doesn't 'know' any of them. since he does not know they will not let us see him, he thinks we are too mad to try and help him. he said part of him didn't think we'd do that, but then again, he didn't know, all he knows is that we just hadn't been there.
we have a copy of the police report. the report states that these two women claim Matt pointed a gun at them out on the hwy, 10 miles out of town, so they followed him. they go on to say that they called Oklahoma Highway Patrol and reported it. that the person who answered the phone told them to follow him!
first of all, if someone points a gun at me, I'm not following them!
secondly, why call the highway patrol and not 911, who just knows that number off the top of their head?
and third, there is no way you can make me believe that someone from the OHP told them to follow this person who just pointed a gun at them!
they go on to say that they followed him through town, because they were told to, until he stopped, and that then he came at them with a bat. that's when they drove to the police station for help.
ok, am I the only one calling BS on this? Matt did tell us he got the bat out of the trunk because he didn't know what they were about to do. while he should have just gone on inside the clinic, because truthfully, what help is a bat if they have a gun, and they were obviously whack-a-doodle! I can certainly understand why he got the bat out, I'd have probably done the same if not more! but lets be honest here, when dealing with people this crazy, it is best to just walk the hell away! if not run!!
here we are day three of the nightmare, Matt is not being charged with assault of a deadly weapon as there was no deadly weapon, but instead unlawful carry of a weapon. the bat. and why this charge, because they had arrested him, although he was never read his rights or anything, they had arrested him, and kept him. they couldn't just let him go and not charge him with anything because then we would have grounds to sue the county. at least that is what we were told by a jail employee, the lawyer, and someone else that I don't remember. not only would I have NOT done that, I didn't even know it was possible.
and now, I have the name of these women, and their address. that also didn't make sense to me, how Matthew was given a report that told who filed a complaint against him. what if he really did pull a gun on them! so, I creeped them on fb, and saw them posting all this mess about how someone pulled a gun on them and how scared they were. and now they had people chiming in, including their brother, mouthing how they were going to find this ___ ___ ___ and show him what it was like to have a gun in his face. did I think they'd do it? who knows what crazy will do? we had their address, did they have ours? we all live in the same small town.
we met with the lawyer, he says it's a " 'open & close case', we will have no problem winning this. once I tell the DA you are going to fight this, they will drop the charges, they don't like to lose. I can't wait to get these two women on the stand, there are so many holes in their story! I'll get a copy of the 911 call Matt made. As long as you had other softball equipment in the car, they can't make this charge stick"
sounds great, right. finally, some hope, a end to the nightmare. the lawyer, he was the biggest joke of all!
there is just no way to make this a short story, don't know why I thought so. I will finish it up with my next post though, as this one has gotten way too long.
and on another note, this layout is from the first time we all got together at the big house in TX. we made a sonic run and somehow I ended up wearing my cherry limeaid. and somehow, some of you thought it was a perfect kodak moment! could be why I love you guys!
Married to my best friend. Mother to two fantastic kids. Daughter to parents I love. Friend to some very talented women. If I'm not able to be creative in someway each day, it's as if something is missing from that day. Lovin' life one day at a time! So welcome to my part of the world, where I'll talk about things going on in my life and try not to bore you! Thanks for looking.